Everyone that loved me more than I could tell, I'm sorry...

So, I updated my website again. Three more songs that I found in my old notebooks, and two new poems. There is one in the God section and one in the Life section. I am actually somewhat pleased with both of them, but feel free to give me any criticism/impressions you have. I will post them right below the signature, in case you don't want to go to the website. The only thing that's different there is that you can read my little comments before the thingie. I know some people would never read them if I didn't put them here though. :) You can go to the site for the lyrics.

There is some excitement going on at work! It is kind of turning into "Survivor: TRW Factory", because we have more workers than we probably need and as a result we will probably cut from about 10 workers to 4-5 this week. We'll see. There is a group of really lazy guys who have somehow escaped the cuts so far, but the boss is aware of them so I am pretty confidant in my job. Until then, it is mostly sitting around getting paid to wait for more work to do.

Reez is going down to Steubenville to do the whole "Registration Day" thing this Thursday/Friday. That means she gets a school email, which means she gets on Facebook, which kind of excites me for some reason. :D I hope that she has a great time down there!

Ed stopped by to return Reez's watch today during dinner and got roped into eating some food. That was fun, I had a very good time. I am feeling pretty peaceful about life in general. God works all things for the good of those who love Him, even if it seems senseless sometimes to us. Love the questions, like locked rooms, and someday live your way into the answer. Yadda, yadda. You all have heard it before. These are the thoughts that are dominating my mind these late-nights.

Man, sometimes life just seems to have so many possibilities that it paralyzes you. It is like I wrote in my first LJ entry ever: I probably have enough money to hop on an airplane to pretty much anywhere. I am almost 20 years old. I could live any life that I wanted to! But ultimately, no matter what I desire (I know what I /want/: the will of God), no matter the approval or disapproval of others, the only person who can give permission or denial is God, who loves us so much that, while we were still sinners, Christ died for us!

Father, I adore You, lay my heart before You. How I love You.
Jesus, I adore You, lay my heart before You. How I love You.
Spirit, I adore You, lay my heart before You. How I love You.

"There's a private Hell, for those who only live to love themselves..."
-L

Desperados -6/14/06

Yeah, love's the last refuge of sinners and saints
Cuz we've all grown up so beat down and afraid
It takes us so long just to see that we're made
For something better than this

Still that revelation does not satiate
Not sure what we are, we just know what we hate
From 10,000 lessons we learned the hard way
Our 10,001 lonely mistakes

Thus failures beat lessons, just one step ahead
Lit fire in our hearts and cried salt in our beds
A passion to live in a way where we'll thrive
So strong it comes down to just "do or we'll die"!

We stand at the ready with one last brave cry:
"You'll
NEVER
Take us
Alive."


The Way I've Made You (Not the Way You've Grown) -6/14/06

We've had our share of darknesses
That seemed to leave us in despair
But from the frigid nights we lived
Our eyes have learned to search the air
And seek the sun while it is day.

We've had our share of pesticide
That hurt so much, we thought we'd die
But ev'ry time it was applied
It killed the things that drained us dry
And to this day, we still have thrived.

We've had our share of prunings since
We knelt and wept and loudly cried
Laid bare, we saw the blossoms fall
"Good God, all my accomplishments!"
To which He said,
"My precious Bride."